The Usual Question

A new acquaintance of mine put it bluntly - do I treat my two children differently? Do I instinctively approach them differently because one is older and the other is younger or because of their personality differences?

My first reaction was defensive since, to my ear, this question seemed to imply an assumption that no siblings are treated equally, and one may be treated favorably over the other(s).

The fact that I have two young boys with less than a three year age gap means for me that I actually can relate to them quite similarly, especially as the younger son is now a toddler and no longer requires special infant attention.

No way would I ever want to treat them differently! At the same time it doesn't mean I treat them identically but I definitely strive for an equal relationship.

What do you think about this "usual question"? 

Memorable Parenting Moments

Off the top of your head, what are the most memorable parenting moments you have of your two sons? Perhaps it's something that comes to mind due to what has happened today, or something that you think about frequently. Try to capture the moment, image and feeling in writing - perhaps also so that you can one day share a "snapshot" with your son(s).

Photo Greetings from Berlin

I recently visited Checkpoint Charlie again, one of the border crossings between East and West Berlin, and spent some time in an Asisi panorama tower (with a 180 degree, 10 meter high panorama view of the Berlin with a wall, with changing sounds and lighting to create the feeling of being "present"). Hence an image in return from this city that has such a fascinating history. 

A young child is lifted up onto the Wall to celebrate the city's reunification in 1989

Getty Images

Photo Greetings from Hong Kong!

Good morning from Hong Kong!

Here's a photo of a Hong Kong mom and daughter. Not taken by me but on loan from Getty Images. It was in yesterday's news that Getty Images, the world's largest photo agency, is releasing millions of their photos for public use. So I had to try it out! Maybe we'll get some good Berlin photos as well?

How much should a woman be a mother?

Should women with children primarily be mothers? How would you quantify (is possible) your own role as a person, woman, wife, friend, and mother (please choose your set of identities and way of quantifying freely)? Is there an ideal, objective balance, and are there minimum times that one should spend on these specific roles, in your view - in particular on parenting? Please also explain how you think this changes as children grow up, and whether you are planning your own role also for the future, when your children are fairly independent - or whether you just take things a day at a time? (Lots of questions! Feel free to pick and choose and focus on what suits your situation and message.)

Parenting Books

Since we both live abroad we've had to rely on our on resources without the full safety net of friends and family around us. Did you read a lot of parenting guides when expecting your first child? Did you keep reading them later on? Did you find any good ones? 

What inspires us as parents?

Occasionally, we meet parents who inspire us. For example, a parent may manage to stay remarkably calm in moments of utter stress or even danger. Or they may have a special routine for how to manage with living a more balanced life. They may simply have an aura of coolness, which reminds us that we can age with style and in our own way, even with a snotty, screaming toddler on our side and chaos in our homes. There are of course parents - or situations - which cause us to raise our eyebrows or roll our eyes. But I'd love to hear about the prior here. Describe a few moments or situations, or issues you've encountered, that inspired you as a parent.